Surely the differences between an authentic leader and a horrible boss are obvious. However, is not correct to say it is all about behaviours, since some of the most authentic leaders I know are capable of ‘poor’ behaviour at times.
The fundamental difference for me is one of motivation. Authentic leaders are motivated solely by doing what’s best for the organisation. Horrible bosses are motivated solely by doing what’s best for themselves.
This article looks at the eight traits of horrible bosses, and offers up four strategies that can be used by their beleaguered employees to handle them.
The eight traits of horrible bosses
1. They believe in a 4th law of thermodynamics
The three principle laws of thermodynamics explain how the physical universe works. Some physicists think there is a 4th ‘zeroth’ law, however, horrible bosses know for sure that a 4th law exists. It is the law that states that nothing happens unless they are physically there to witness it. The hard pressed employee can have been putting in 12 hour days, but if the boss doesn’t see it, it will count for nothing. The employee might have done some brilliantly creative work on one aspect of the project, only for the boss to utterly dismiss it in a meeting.
2. They are skilled and habitual liars
Horrible bosses lie. They have to, since they are continually constructing reasons (excuses) for why their results are so poor. Of course many times the lies are not blatant, since they could be caught out, so a typical example will be a massive generalisation, or when the boss states a ‘fact’ that is in reality only their opinion. If they are challenged, they will counter with a well rehearsed and vigorous defence of the ‘truth’. When coupled with their habit of ‘conveniently’ forgetting things (things they have said or committed to), this trait is almost impossible to navigate.
3. They belittle people
It would be wrong to assume that horrible bosses are mere unconscious organisms thrashing through the day with no strategy in place. They are in fact capable of some very proactive behaviours. One of these is to motivate their employees with humour, personal favour and familiarity. This manifests in for example, hugely inappropriate use of sexual innuendo, sarcasm, devising nicknames etc. Since toxic bosses often have to recover situations when even they realise they have gone too far with their Employees, they also tend to use inappropriate rewards as bribes or to salve their own conscience. They will even apologise but only if they fear that some third party authority could be called in. This is all hugely belittling for people.
4. They actively promote ‘them and us’
‘Them and us’ cultures are perhaps the most pernicious type within organisations. Horrible bosses are great promoters of ‘them and us’, since it helps their cause in two ways. First of all it means hey can ‘divide and conquer’ their subordinates – if their employees are fighting amongst themselves, then they can’t notice how bad their boss is. Secondly it means they can avoid accountability for real results such as sales and profits, since they have to ‘waste’ so much time because of the dysfunctionality of the organisation - a fact which they infer to be the fault of their own superiors.
5. They vacillate
One of the hardest things about working for a horrible boss is that they vacillate so much. One day they will passionately believe position X, and the next they will lambast an employee for the utter stupidity of believing position X to be right. Horrible bosses are often rather perversely trusted by their employees, but this is only possible if their behaviour is relatively predictable. But truly horrible bosses are tough to endure since their vacillation makes it almost impossible for the employee to take predict their response, thus any sort of proactive action is simply too risky.
6. They sulk
Horrible bosses are often just spoiled children. They are needy and self absorbed. When things don’t go their way, when they don’t get the recognition or praise they so clearly deserve, they sulk. Since horrible bosses can also hold a grudge with a superhuman intensity and relish (and for soooooo long.......) it is best not to upset them, in fact their employees often have to be the ones to tell their boss how brilliant they are and how the team simply could not do without their leadership and their ideas.
7. They bully and manipulate
Bosses who hold their beliefs and views very passionately often intimidate their employees, indeed it is often the lament of the authentic leader to feel that they upset their employees by having to behave ‘unreasonably’ with them. But the horrible boss goes one step further. The horrible boss bullies people. This can be overt, in the form of swearing, shouting or generally being physically intimidating. But the truly horrible boss knows how to bully under the radar – belittling, criticising and undermining their employees. They are also skilled manipulators, knowing how to play on their employees’ fears and emotions of guilt.
8. They disappear
T S Eliot plaintively cried “Macavity’s not there” in his famous poem. Macavity the Mystery Cat defied Scotland Yard, because whenever they were about to catch him in the act, the cry would go up “Macavity’s not there”. The horrible boss has the supreme ability to disappear when the ‘sh*t hits the fan’ – literally to go missing, returning with some plausible excuse (of which they have a never ending litany), incredulous that the crisis arose, yet delighted that the world has yet again proven that bad things happen when they are not around. Truly they are indispensible.
The four strategies for handling horrible bosses
The greatest single remedy is awareness – to know that it is not you. Horrible bosses are dangerous because they cause employees to come to believe that it is them that is at fault, not their boss. So having an awareness that you do in fact work for a horrible boss is a massive relief and can in itself keep the employee in relatively good mental health.
There are four strategies that the employee of the horrible boss can adopt:
1. Coping
Anyone can handle being managed by a horrible boss for a short period of time. It is simply a matter of adopting, either individually or collectively, some coping mechanisms. This might include huge amounts of communication about activities, making sure the boss gets the recognition, smiling inanely at their embarrassing humour, or covering for them when they go AWOL.
The thing to do is to consciously list the behaviours that are offensive, and come up with a coping mechanism for each one. This can then become a kind of game, allowing the employee to maintain a sanity and personal protection through the length of the coping period.
2. Outliving
Whereas a coping strategy is by definition not trying to change the boss, but merely survive and endure until something changes, a strategy of outliving the boss is more proactive and is designed to contribute to bringing about the boss’s demise. This is more likely to be a conspiratorial strategy with similarly beleaguered colleagues.
This strategy may include the covert fostering of relationships with third parties, particularly the horrible boss’s own superiors, and making sure that it is the employees who are recognised for any successes.
3. Whistle-blowing
The scariest of all strategies is to be the one who exposes the horrible boss. A failed attempt at a coup will leave the employee in a worse position, where leaving is probably inevitable. Many employees, even if they have the personal strength and integrity to be a whistle-blower, refrain because they cannot see a good end result for the organisation or themselves. So why take the risk?
4. Leaving
All the research shows that employees leave bosses, not companies. Ultimately any employee has the choice of leaving, and often this is the only course of action that resolves the insidious situation the employee finds themselves in. However, this is again a very tough call for the employee to make. First of all it means they have to find themselves another job, and risk jumping out of the frying pan into the fire, and secondly they have to deal with the anger and frustration of being made to leave a job and a company that they may love but for one horrible boss.
See also: 'Bosses from hell - are job seekers that desperate' in The People Bulletin, 19 May 2011